Some prospective clients come to me certain that their marriage is over.  These prospective clients are ready to start the process of divorce.

Others are kicking the tires—they are uncertain whether they are ready for divorce or not.  What they really want is to be provided an overview of their rights and obligations should they choose to divorce.  There are many clients who come to me that don’t want to divorce at all—but must take action because their spouses have initiated the divorce process.  Finally, there are prospective clients who are in abusive relationships.  These are the people who are likely best served by starting the divorce process as soon as possible.

The First Question to Ask, is Whether Divorce is Really the Answer?

Some rocky marriages truly are salvageable.  As I am not a psychologist or a marriage therapist, it’s not for me to say whether a prospective client’s marriage is worth attempting to save or not.  But I often do recommend that parties (absent extenuating circumstances such as abuse) attempt marriage counseling prior to initiating a divorce.  If nothing else, this may help the parties understand each other and the reasons why divorce is necessary better.

Many clients benefit from counseling during the divorce process.  The emotions and psychology of a divorce are real, and sometimes it helps to worth through them with a trained expert.

Another truth is that in the realm of divorce law, clients can be there own worst enemies.  Wanting to punish the other party, or to take unrealistic negotiating positions can draw out divorces, and lead to much larger costs than necessary.


It’s simple common sense that before you should start with a divorce proceeding, you must know in your heart that the chance of saving the marriage is slim or zero.  Once you have settled that question, you can then begin with divorce process full-steam ahead, and with a clear conscious as to your decisions and objectives.

In summation, before one starts the New Jersey divorce process, they should ask him or herself:  is divorce really the answer? Everything else flows from the answer to that simple but overwhelmingly complex question.


Your New Jersey Divorce Lawyer:

If you’re considering a New Jersey divorce or Family Law action contact me to discuss your options.  You can schedule an initial consultation by calling my office at 908-237-3096 or by scheduling your own divorce consultation online by clicking here.

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